Ello There My Loves! As we approach that time of the year where many are prepping for graduation and real-life adulthood (real bills, real responsibilities, and a real need for steady income), I just wanted to share my post-graduate experience thus far. Life after graduation was far from expected. On this post, I will be sharing my experiences after graduating both undergrad and graduate school– since each milestone came with its’ own set of peaks and valleys.
Life After Undergrad: Graduate School
After graduating from undergrad in May 2014, I felt very peaceful about this milestone. My peace came because I already knew exactly what I was doing after graduating with my Bachelors –which was similar to what I was doing before… More school. I decided to get my Masters Degree immediately following my Bachelors because I did not want to risk not actually returning back to school. I heard all too often about people completing their first degree, landing a job out of college, and then getting too comfortable in the life of earning money and new found freeness in schedule. Going back to school then becomes more of a task, outweighing the initial value and importance of earning that second degree.
Sidebar: I know everyone is not called to attain a second degree. My reference here is based on individuals who had the goal of continuing school, but lost their drive after gaining freedom and income.
Knowing myself, I did not want to take that chance. Now, fast-forwarding to my Masters… Thanks to the Lord that I was able to get into a Master’s program at my alma mater! I did not have to move from my apartment –which was a huge blessing! (I will write another blog post about stepping out on faith and choosing to re-sign my lease prior to having any concrete plans post-grad). I physically did not have to change anything about my environment. The main changes that took place were that: 99% of my closest friends graduated and left and the type of courses that I enrolled in were now dramatically different. I went from an arts-based major (Theatre with a minor in Chemistry…yes, I know lol) to Public Administration. This was a significant shift, but I was able to mold the program to be relevant to my interests –the arts, underrepresented groups, and nonprofit management.
Now, going through my Masters program, it was certainly not an easy journey because tasks that I avoided in previous stages of my life started to pop again. I tried to avoid writing my entire undergraduate career –BUT of course my new area of study required me to now write papers week-after-week! Multiple papers per week! Up to 50 written pages of paper in a research! It never ended and I thought it was very funny —How sway? Funny how?? Well, I was able to see the funny in it because God knew writing was something that I avoided all of my life and of course it ended up catching up with me –which is very true for almost everything in our lives.We cannot avoid going through challenges because when we go around it, we will surely end up bumping into that same obstacle in a new area of our lives— and that is basically what happened to me in graduate school and writing. I was able to complete graduate school developing and see strengths in my writing that I never knew existed.
Sidebar: I share this as my testimony to show you that there is always a blessing on the other side of your challenges. I avoided writing because it takes a lot of effort for me to begin a piece, however, when I write, I find my voice –a voice that so eloquently conveys the deepest ponderings of my heart. Avoiding going through the challenges, meant that I was avoiding building and retrieving my divinely gifted talent. So, the next time you want to avoid an obstacle, please first consider what blessing may lie on the other side of you successfully maneuvering through it? The same thing you are avoiding may be the key to your breakthrough.
Life After Graduate School: Adulting 101
While I was going to graduate school, as time wound down, I was a very much over it and ready to graduate. However, now that I’ve graduated, I see that there was a huge chunk of life that I was definitely NOT prepared for. Adulting. A D U LT I NG. Adulting. For the first time in life, there was a no planned structure that was readily created for me –I was now charged with building my life. The joy of being set free from the boundaries of schooling was quickly replaced with confusion, self-doubt, fear, anxiousness, sadness, lostness, and even a slight depression. I was finished with school, but I was in turn just beginning life. I was also confused because I THOUGHT going through the struggle of undergrad and finally figuring out what I wanted to major in would be the answer to the rest of my life –all my life’s questions should have been settled once I picked a major, right? That was the biggest lie ever conceived! Then to get to my masters, I thought that I arrived in life since I was on a “real” track and focused on a particular area of study. I really THOUGHT I had it all down pack… ← This was another big lie.
After graduating with my masters, I started contemplating my entire life. I started wishing that I began honing my crafts from when I was four years old– thinking of how different life would be had I started training from a toddler. I did more thinking backwards than I did thinking forwards. I started to doubt the area of focus for my Masters Degree. I also started to doubt the things I did my Bachelors Degree in. I truly believe that this replay of “ what if ” causes us to dwell on the unchangeable past, which then blocks us from embracing the possibilities of our future. Life after graduating was hard for me. It was not hard in the sense of not having support because I was surrounded with support my entire life (which I give all thanks to God for because many are unable to say the same). It was not hard in the sense of not having a place to live because thankfully I was able to move back home to Brooklyn, NY. Lastly, it was not hard in terms of struggling to find a job right out the gate of graduating because (thankfully) I was able to secure a temporary position back at the same agency that I partnered with for my graduate research.
So here it goes… Life after graduating was hard because I was not doing what I thought I would be doing. While I was technically doing “okay”, I was living FAR from my expectations and I did not know which way to take in order to get to the place that I envisioned myself. It was hard because while I was surrounded by a lot of people, I still felt alone in my feelings and on my current journey. It was hard because I truthfully did not know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. Which now when I think about it, is a tremendous amount of pressure that we put on ourselves → the need to figure out the rest of our lives so close to the beginning of our lives. There is a lot of life to learn, experience, and assess before permanent decisions are made.
I can truly say that life after graduation has been a humbling journey. I went from being employed for a few months, to quickly unemployed for a few of months, and then back to being employed. I work(ed) in a government office – I worked in a warehouse– yes an actual warehouse! And the most amazing part– I traveled! I traveled to more places in 2016 than ever in my life. I began getting booked for singing performances at events! I revamped my social media. Lastly, I finally launched my website (hey now!) and began building my brand! When I did not know what to do…I invested time in doing all of the things that I enjoyed doing –and in the midst of my being lost, I started to actually find myself.
Sidebar: This blog post is not going to be a post about how I “figured out life” because I truly have not fully lived. I am still walking and bumping into things, being caught off-guard, plans deviated, doors closing ,other doors opening, even new things peaking my interests. I am still going through life and the journey, but I just want to speak to those who are about to graduate or are or have graduated recently, to tell you that you ARE going to find yourself.
What I Have Learned Thus Far…
Before we get to the stage of discovery, we have to first actually search for something. I think it is very common for us you want to automatically arrive where we envisioned ourselves, but we would rather not go through the process of journeying there — no one ever wants to go to the journey because the journey is not always fun, the journey is not always easy, and the journey is not always sexy —but what the journey is, is necessary because you cannot get to the other side of the bridge unless you actually cross it. What does crossing the bridge entail? Walking on uncertainty, being vulnerable, taking a risk, putting your fears aside, and trekking across that bridge to your dreams and goals. It requires faith. It does not require all the knowledge, but it sure does require all faith.
I am learning more and more about myself during this stage of my life that I ever have before and this is due to now having the freedom to create my life as I want it –because I have this freedom, I am able to learn my natural responses to things and detect the areas that are in need of adjustment to evolve to where I need to be. This journey is eye-opening. This journey has caused me to second guess the plans that I originally had, but has also caused me to rely heavily on Christ (my faith) and really focus on the things that I have the power to change. I cannot change the past. I cannot change what I studied in undergrad. I cannot change my area of focus for my Masters, but I can change what I choose to devote my time and energy to on this present day.
So my loves, what I really want to tell you is, life after graduating is not entirely fun. It is hard. But it is so very necessary. During this new season, you will learn more about yourself than you ever knew possible. While going to the journey of discovering who I am and what I will do for the rest of my life, it became very easy for me to look to the world (google, career quizzes, friends, etc.) to define where I needed to go. I started to seek the world for immediate answers, rather than wait on the Lord for guidance and divine confirmation.This is the worst thing that you could ever do –because you are then turning away from your Creator, The One who knows you most and created you to be all that He has called you to be. God is your roadmap, He will guide you–when you let Him. You will grow, if you are willing. The journey will be worth it, once you embark on it –I believe this for both you and myself.
God is been so faithful to me thus far on this winding journey, so I encourage you to trust Him in this post-graduate season because you will soon see that the benefit of the challenge is well worth the ride. A huge CONGRATULATIONS to all of this upcoming Spring 2017 Graduates! Enjoy this moment <3
Until next time… Shine Bright & Illuminate Your Life!
Shanice
P.S. These beautiful graduation photos of my FABulous MPA Beauties were taken by Eduardo Huerta (Photography For A Purpose).
