Throughout this breastfeeding journey, I’ve experienced low-milk supply, clogged ducts, painful nipples (mostly in the beginning of the journey), and lots of self-doubt when I thought my milk “wasn’t enough” for my baby. But after getting through those hurdles, I am so happy to say that we made it! You can have a successful breastfeeding journey, even with a lower milk supply. I am not a natural over-producer with a freezer overflowing with additional milk – so I definitely understand, Mama. Find peace in knowing that your body makes enough milk for your baby – anything extra is great but not necessary. 

Here are a few tips that helped me breastfeed my son for almost 11-months – I pray that it is a blessing to you on your journey as well. Please share this post with an expectant-mom or new mom who is considering breastfeeding.

Tips for A Successful Breastfeeding Journey

1. Get A Lactation Consultant and schedule a consultation before birth to educate yourself and prepare healthy expectations for your breastfeeding journey. Also, have your spouse attend with you, if possible. This would help prepare both of your minds for what breastfeeding entails so that everyone is on the same page.
2. Select A Baby-Friendly Hospital that encourages skin to skin immediately after birth and breastfeeding support – which includes meeting with a lactation specialist during your hospital stay to ensure that baby is latching properly. Skin to skin contact immediately after birth helps you begin the bonding process with your baby and alerts your body to begin producing milk. 
3. Communicate How Important Breastfeeding Is To You to your support system – so at the first sign of struggle that they don’t suggest getting formula. The first 2-3 weeks it will be a bit challenging (physically and mentally) – baby will be feeding round-the-clock and you (or others) may feel as if he or she is never “full”. The reality is that your baby is cluster feeding – because they are growing and the frequent feeding alerts your body to produce more milk (which is a good thing). Disclaimer: Formula is not a bad thing if your baby needs it – however frequently substituting a feeding with formula (or a bottle of breastmilk) and not breastfeeding (or pumping) during that session would eventually impact your milk supply because it signals to your body that your baby does not need milk for that particular feeding.
4. Get Plugged Into A Community – Join a Breastfeeding Moms Facebook Group and also ask for tips from successfully breastfeeding mothers that you may know personally. I received so many helpful tips from friends that also breastfed! Here are two Facebook groups that I found to be extremely helpful as well: Milky Mamas Breastfeeding Support Group and Breastfeeding Support Group For Black Moms.
5. Your Diet is IMPORTANT. Drink lots of water. Look up “lactogens” – foods that help with the production of breastmilk and add them to your regular diet. Barley water, coconut water, and eating oatmeal helped tremendously with my milk production. Eat a balanced diet – you will naturally need more calories because breastfeeding requires additional caloric intake. Look up what foods can decrease your milk supply and avoid them as much as you can within reason. Alcohol decreases your supply and other foods like peppermint and parsley are known to impact supply as well. 
6. Latch Your Baby – Frequently latching your baby helps with milk production. The more milk you remove from your breasts the more you will produce. Feed your baby every 2-3 hrs. If you are latching and still have a low-supply or you are looking to build a freezer stash look into Power-pumping to replicate cluster feeding which would aid in increasing your supply. 
7. Nipple Cream! Do yourself a favor and get some nipple cream. Especially during those early weeks were a lifesaver for me. Don’t let your nipples become dry and cracked – this makes breastfeeding even more painful. Here is the nipple cream that I used: Lanolin Nipple Cream. A natural option of nipple cream is coconut oil. Fun Fact: Rubbing breast milk on your nipples and allowing it to air dry also helps heal cracked/irritated/sore nipples. 

*Bonus Tip: Limit Stress. Stress negatively impacts your milk supply. When I returned back to working full-time, I was incredibly stressed and noticed a huge decrease in my milk supply. I had to take power-pumping and barely water into overdrive – I even purchased a container of formula because I wanted to make sure my baby was fed. Thankfully, my supply recovered. But it was definitely a wake-up call for me to do my best to limit the stress that I took on.

Overall, Mama, grace yourself. Be kind to yourself. A healthy mom and fed baby is most important whatever your journey may look like. Everyone’s experience as a new mother is unique in its own way – yet we can all still learn a thing or two from the next mama. 

If any of these tips were helpful to you or you have a few tips of your own, please leave a comment below 🙂 

The quality of everything that we produce is directly correlated with our quality of life. It is impossible to pour from an empty cup. Prioritizing your self-care is one way to ensure that your cup is always full. Here are (5) self-care tips that when implemented – will change your life completely.

Tip #1: Schedule Time to Pamper Yourself

This may sound basic – but often times our “Me Time” is the first thing to go when life gets overwhelmingly busy. How can we avoid this? Manually input scheduled “Me Time” in your weekly calendar. Set aside at least 2-hours a week that you can devote to pampering yourself. It can be a 2-hour block or 15-30 minutes a day. What should you do during this time? Feed your mind, body, and spirit.

• • Mind: Personal Development (read a new book/blog, listen to a podcast, etc.)
  • Body: Honor Your Temple (exercise, engage in physical activity, get your nails and hair done, give yourself a facial, plan an at-home spa day, etc.)

• • Spirit: Plug into God (set aside time to read your bible, pray daily, find a devotional relevant to your current season in life)

The key is that this scheduled time is now built into your daily life. Your “Me Time” is a mandatory meeting that you have to attend – so strategically plan your day(s) around it.

Tip #2: Mute Social Media

I’ll say it. You need a break from social media. Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Snap Chat, and Pinterest are wonderful tools – when used in moderation. However, these tools can also become time-suckers and comparison traps if we are not careful. Limit how much time you spend on social media each day and turn your devices off (or place on ‘Do Not Disturb’) at least 1-hr before bed. Give your mind a chance to unplug and unwind.

Tip #3: Add “No” Into Your Vocabulary

‘No’ is a complete sentence. Often times our lives are overwhelmed with people, things, and situations that could have easily been avoided if we simply said “No”. Be transparent about your plate of responsibilities and stop committing yourself to new things that are not currently in alignment with the call on your life or helping you become the BEST you that you can be. Here’s what to say if someone asks you to do something that you cannot commit to: “Thank you for considering me. Unfortunately, I am unable to help at this time. But I wish you continued success and all the best on your endeavor !”.

Tip #4: Express Yourself Freely

Create a safe space where you can freely express your deepest thoughts and help with the processing of your emotions. Some recommendations are: Therapy, Journaling, Connect Groups/Fellowship Groups, Art Classes, etc. Having an outlet to freely and safely express yourself is crucial to both your mental and emotional health.

Tip #5: Make Your Peace A Non-Negotiable

Prioritize protecting your peace (here is a cute mug for a daily reminder). Anything that compromises your sanity, self-esteem, worth, physical/mental/emotional/spiritual health – HAS TO GO. Nothing is worth the peace, love, and joy that God has created you to experience. Be intentional about surrounding yourself with people, places, and things that are cultivating you to be better – not bitter.

Once implemented, these (5) simple, yet powerful, self-care tips will change your life for the better. Start one-by-one. Plan practical ways on how you can successfully incorporate each tip into your lifestyle by creating a schedule, setting timers/reminders on your phone and apps, and adding “Self-Care Time” on your calendar each week. Developing a self-care routine is an on-going journey that can change depending on your current season in life. Grace yourself with the time necessary to figure out what works for you and understand every decision that you make to prioritize your best self COUNTS. Revisit this checklist weekly to see how you are doing in each area of self-care and be intentional about tending to the areas that may need more improvement.

What self-care tip can you implement today? Let me know in the COMMENTS below! If you enjoyed this blog and found it helpful, please SHARE, TELL A FRIEND, and PIN.

For additional help feeding your spirit, grab my 7-Day Self-Love Devotional to help you uncover self-love, God’s love, and your worth.

Until Next Time…Shine Bright & Illuminate Your Life!

–Shanice <3

Give the gift of Self-Love this Valentine’s Day! Click Here to check out our Limited Edition Valentine’s Day themed Self-Love Bundle that is jampacked with everything that you will need to begin loving yourself unapologetically as the greatness God has created you to be. This is the perfect gift for you and your favorite GALentine!

Welcome back! Thank you for all of your love and support that you have shared with me since the release of Part I of my testimony – Denouncing Delta: Answering God’s Call. If you missed Part I, Click Here to read it.

The hardest things to let go of are oftentimes the same sacrifices that God uses to mightily bless us. God wants to make room in your life for the blessings that He has in store for you. As humans, we often try to fill the voids in our lives with temporary satisfactions such as social status, people (significant & insignificant others), money, clothes, clubs, food, work, and the “turn-up” (because we know when we actually turn-down, life is a bit lonely and we never truly learned how to be complete apart from the temporary fillers). As humans, we naturally have a desire to fill the voids in our lives because we have a desire for wholeness. But truthfully, the “fulfilled” life can only be achieved through quality partnership with God. We naturally need God in order for our voids to be permanently filled because, simply put, He is our maker and apart from Him we are incomplete.

I was unaware of my incompleteness, unaware of the voids that I was attempting to subconsciously fill, and unaware that I did not have to jump through hoops in order for God to use and bless me. I am 100% sure that if I knew WHO I was in Christ earlier in life and intentionally cultivated a relationship (not a religion) with God, I would not have even contemplated joining DST or any sorority as a matter-of-fact. I am also 100% sure that anyone who is truly made whole in Christ would not fall as easily prey to idol worship –whether it is idolizing your job, your relationship, people, even yourself –because they are aware that the one-true-God is the source of their strength, intelligence, success, beauty, impact, and power.

I admit that I was unaware of my true identity in Christ, so it was very easy for me to be susceptible to the things of this world. When we do not fully know who we are, we allow others the ability to dictate and decide who we are and what we are made to do. If I truly knew who I was in Christ… I would not have sought out an organization to give me purpose, to humble me under their god/goddess, to make me prove my worthiness of acceptance, to “build me up”, to rename me, and make me into who I was “called” to be. God ALREADY did that. He already knew and thought of me before I was even in my mother’s womb (Jeremiah 1:5). He ALREADY called me. He ALREADY purposed me. He ALREADY proved that I was worth His love, His sacrifice and His devotion through His grace —His unmerited favor. He is ALREADY making me (daily) into His image to be used as a vessel for His ultimate glory. But as I said, I was unaware, so I lived life making my own decisions attempting to temporarily fill the voids that existed.

It would be wonderful if we all knew this at our first attempt at life –or at least I wish I really came into the consciousness of WHO and WHOSE I was sooner, but we live and we learn. The major key is always that we LEARN!

Alright, let us get back to before I knew better…

Life As A Member of DST

When I was living bound in idolatry, God was now on a shared platform in my life –even though it was not my intention, this is essentially what took place when I decided to devote my life, my love, and my all to the organization.

When we place into words and bring to light the spiritual implications of all of our actions, it oftentimes becomes a hard pill to swallow because we live in a world where “seeing is believing” and “ignorance is bliss”. Ignorance is the quickest way to be lured into undesired territory due to our unwillingness to take control and responsibility over our lives (both present and eternal). It is easier to ignore and invalidate what we do not see, but the quality of both our present life and life after death are based on things that we do not see —occurrences in the spiritual realm. We would be remiss to believe that all there is to life is the location right before our eyes here in the natural world. But even as a young girl who grew up in the church and proclaimed her love for Jesus, I still chose to live life in an “ignorance is bliss” mindset because it was easy and I was able to do whatever I wanted —I just had to pray that the repercussions would not be too bad. This type of thinking undermined God’s authority, even put a question mark my need for Him, and revealed that I cared more about what I could get from The Source than The Source itself. 

It is hard to imagine that I would let anything compete with my God’s place in my life and the love that I have for Him –but even though it is hard to say and hard to imagine, it definitely was not hard to do. At this particular moment in my life, I knew who to call when I was in need of an answered prayer, but that is the thing —I only called on God when I needed something. I did not truly have a relationship with Him. I knew of Him, knew that I needed Him, and knew that He was all powerful. However, I did not truly know Him for myself, know fully of my identity in Him, fully grasp the magnitude of His love for me –as I said, if I did, I probably would not have been so led to join a sorority or seeking anything outside of God to give me purpose, define who I was, and open doors for me. Even with the desire to join DST, if I truly had a personal relationship with God, I would have been able to clearly discern His voice when I was praying for guidance. But as I said before in PART I, I really was not trying to hear anything outside of God allowing me to become a member of the organization —so there is no real surprise that I actually got my way … I clearly cared more about the manifestation of my own will over God’s intended will for my life.

I FINALLY CROSSED!…

When I officially crossed and finally became a member of DST, I was on the highest cloud imaginable. Along with my letters came an increased sense of responsibility and pride.

Side Bar: It just so happened that right after I crossed, I saw one of my teachers who previously became a member of DST and inspired my membership. I was so hype to tell her that we were sisters now! That I finally crossed into the most “illustrious” organization! I made it to Deltaland! For my excitement to be met with a blank look and the response “Oh, I am no longer a part of that organization.”…Wait WHET?! While I probably should have taken this one as a REAL sign (lol) — I did not really know what to say, but I definitely didn’t ask any questions because I was NOT going to let anything steal my high. Ignorance was bliss, remember? I just said “Oh… Okay. Well, it was nice to see you!” and kept it pushing. Later on, I found out that God called her out of the organization as well with a POWERFUL testimony to share of His faithfulness.

You. Could. Not. Tell. Me. Nothin’. I chanted, shouted, and SANG DST with everything that was in me. What else would you expect? I worked HARD for these letters, so I was going to wear them with pride and my head held high. I gained a new sense of purpose and a new life (which is true because through the process I was MADE into a Delta). I needed people to know that this was the ONLY way and that I was part of the best organization to have ever been created. Being a member of DST became my new identity and priority. Prior to becoming a member, I was heavily involved in my university’s Gospel Choir. I was known around campus as “The Gospel Choir Girl” or “Shanice From Gospel Choir“. I went from being known for singing in Gospel Choir to now sharing Jesus’ spotlight. Now, I was known as “Shanice The Delta“. Even with the new found pride that I gained with my letters, this never sat right with me internally. I loved being known for singing praises unto Jesus, and the change made a part of me feel as though I was taking light away from Him.

Now you may think I’m reading wayyy too deep into this –like “Shanice, it’s really not that serious lol“. But your name dedicates who you are and WHOSE you are. People call you who they believe you to be and belong to. Now, I belonged to Delta. Which was not very far from the truth. I DID indeed belong to Delta now —Physically, Mentally, & Spiritually. When I joined the sorority, I took an oath to be bound for life (a lifetime membership) to this entity. Back then, I was naive of the spiritual implications and soul-ties that would come along with my decision. Little did I know that I freely gave my life into spiritual warfare and it would take a few years, a few ignored red flags, a few bypassed convictions, and a few people praying for me (that I was TOTALLY unaware of) for me to come to this realization. But prior to then, I was okay with living in my flesh and enjoying the things of this world.

In addition to Jesus now being in a shared spotlight, I was now promoting living a double life. As I said prior, community service, campus leadership, and the fact that it was founded on Christian principles were the main components that drew me to DST  –however, all of the work that was done was all to the glory and praise of delta (which was in direct contradiction to all of the songs that I sang which proclaimed that all the glory belonged to God and God alone –Revelation 7:12). Whenever I succeeded academically whether it was due to achieving the dean’s list, or scoring the highest GPA, or graduating, or receiving any honor I surely did thank God for His grace and mercy, but homage was also paid to delta as I held high the “torch of wisdom”. I was partial in the glory that I gave to God. I was straddling the fence with my devotion to God’s Kingdom and my devotion to delta. My devotion was made clear in the oath that I took upon entering into the organization and rituals and hymns (yes, hymns.)  that I uncomfortably partook in and recited at meetings pertaining to delta.  My spirit was uneasy in reciting the rituals but I could not fully pinpoint ??why?? until God opened my eyes. God showed me that the organization that I joined due to being “founded on Christian principles” in reality twisted scriptures from the bible by removing Jesus and replacing Him with delta. I was no longer striving for Christ, I was now striving for delta. The glory no longer belonged to God, it all belonged delta —and the scariest part was that I was saying these things and performing the rituals for years without fully grasping the depth of my devotion.  How did I make God feel all of these years? I was compromising my salvation. How could I do this? I was supposed to be a disciple of Christ, but I was actually a disciple for delta. I was serving two masters –which God explicitly spoke against in Matthew 6:24 and Exodus 20:3-5, while also fostering the spirit of confusion and deception to onlookers who may have been new to their walk in Christ and seeking to discover WHO and WHOSE they truly were. Even in the social context, my actions also straddled the fence, I would be one way when I was in Gospel Choir practice on Friday evenings and right after head out to a party, drinking a little too much, dancing, and knuckin’ because I was buck.

Many of us are not fully aware of the true power and magnitude of our influence. There are many people who look up to you and the moves that you make with the intention to use your decisions as a guide to determine their own destiny. Similar to how God uses people as vessels to get His work done on earth, the enemy also uses people for his agenda for destruction. The enemy definitely tried to use me as a ploy to influence the interest of many young women, especially those around campus, apart of my gospel choir and my church, to also idolize and seek after membership in the organization —SO, now in addition to compromising my own salvation, I had a hand in jeopardizing someone else’s?! Lord, this was too much.

Life After Finally Answering God’s Call

Even after my eyes were opened and I knew that God was clearly telling me that I needed to let go of the organization, my flesh still wanted to hold on out of fear, disappointment, pride, and judgment. I tried to bargain with God, telling Him that I would no longer go out and rep the organization, I would no longer wear any “para” (paraphernalia with the Greek Letters on it), I would take down the shrine (the corner of my room devoted to all of my delta gifts and elephants —delta had a WHOLE corner in my room and my bible barely made it out of the drawer smh…), I would no longer partake in any official or unofficial business, I would just remain inactive and simply fade into the background while maintaining the relationships that I gained and cherished along the way. As soon as I said this, God spoke so clearly to me… “Man looks at the outside, but I look at your heart. What is your heart telling me since you cannot give this up for me?” (1 Samuel 16:7). Right then and there, I started crying and repenting for the decisions that I made against God. I rather face the fury of man than to face the fury of my God.

My spirit was so tied to this organization that I was willing to bargain with the Great I AM?! How could this be? I did not want to be used by delta. I did not want to used as a ploy by the enemy to lead others astray. I wanted to be used by my God for HIS glory. Neither delta nor anyone in the organization could save me when I experienced the lowest points in my life. No one BUT Jesus Christ my Savior and Redeemer.

I did not want there to be any confusion about the root of glory or purpose in my life. I no longer wanted to straddle the fence. I no longer wanted to be a lukewarm Christian (Revelation 3:16). I wanted and needed to live totally for God. So while it was one of the hardest decisions for me to make, I trusted God to uphold me and decided to formerly go through the process of relinquishing my membership in Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Incorporated after 3.5 years. Most importantly, I began the process of breaking the chains and spiritual strongholds that came along with my membership through prayer, fasting, and cultivating a REAL relationship with God for myself. I did not want there to be any question mark on my life and where I would be spending eternity. Jesus is and will always be the ONLY WAY (John 14:6). I will strive more earnestly to reach the goal that I was called heavenward for Jesus Christ (Philippians 3:13-14). Many are called but FEW are chosen (Matthew 22:14), for the way to heaven is narrow, and the road to destruction is wide (Matthew 7:13-14). Which will you choose?

Once I knew better, I had to DO better. I could no longer live the “ignorance is bliss” life —it was shallow, unfulfilling, and lacking true purpose. I no longer wanted to live a life that was filled with contradiction —it was confusing, chaotic, and detrimental to my ultimate purpose. Everything that I do now is firmly rooted in Christ and spirit-led for discernment and guidance because this life that I am granted to live does not belong to me. God has called for all of me, (including my love, my peace, and my happiness, everything) to be given to Him and Him alone (Matthew 22:37). It is impossible to give your “ALL” to more that one person, place, or thing. Once I realized that my destiny was greatly impacted by my willingness or unwillingness to be obedient to God’s call on my life, I decided that I want to live in the fullness of ALL that God has for me —because HIS plans will ALWAYS prosper and never harm (Jeremiah 29:11). I trusted God to fill me and keep me, and He has far exceeded my expectations in such a short period of time and this is ONLY the beginning. Amen!

While my story is far from over, I thank you for taking the time to listen to my two-part testimony series about how Jesus saved me from the spiritual bondage of idolatry. Love, whatever is it that you are battling, holding on to, or contemplating, I pray peace over your life and discernment for God’s ultimate BEST for you. If you are waiting for God to speak to you again on a topic that He has already made clear in His word, I pray that if you see that the house is on fire, that you do not have to wait until the fire alarm goes off to begin evacuating. Whether it is an organization, job, relationship(s), etc., may you come to the realization that nothing and no one can separate you from the love of Jesus and that it is NEVER too late to begin building your relationship with God. Love, may you live in the fullness of all that God has in store for you and never let anything nor anyone compromise your salvation or God’s place in your life. Do not delay because tomorrow is promised to no one and eternity may be closer than you think. But with the time that we do have, may we all continue to boldly run this race of life realizing that our destinies are too important to give up for anything.

I will leave you with this one question that helped me to determine the condition of my heart: If your God asked you to give up that thing that you are tightly holding on to, would you? Could you make that sacrifice?

Please SHARE, Like, Comment, & SUBSCRIBE! I appreciate all of your continuous love, support, and feedback. All the glory belongs to God.

View My Unexplainable Grace Video Interview on Youtube “Sisterhood in Sororities vs. In Christ”

Until next time… Continue to Shine BRIGHT & Illuminate Your Life,

Shanice <3

P.S. – Helpful Videos?

Here are two videos that I found very eye-opening regarding Christianity and Greek Letter Organizations.

A Christian Testimony: Greek Letter Organizations & Secret Societies (CLICK HERE for the Video)

Renouncing Delta (CLICK HERE for the Video)

–  Wish To Talk More?

If you have any additional questions or would like to chat more about this subject, please feel free to contact me! I’d love to hear from you!

Life Prior To Becoming A Member of DST

Prior to becoming a member of DST, I was heavily involved in my church (basically all of my life) and had a huge heart for servicing my community in any way that I could. Whether it was volunteer work at church, feeding the homeless, HIV/AIDS peer education, tutoring the youth, etc. —if the work was about making my surrounding community a better place, I wanted to be a part of it. So when I got to college and became introduced to “greek life”, I was overall immediately drawn to the leadership and service aspect that was broadcast. I put the thought into the back of my mind as something to consider, but my spirit was not 100% sold on joining any sorority at the moment.

Shortly after beginning my freshman year in college, I had a mini-break (a few days off from school in recognition of the Jewish Holiday) –on this break I went home to Brooklyn and visited my church. It just so happened that the first questions asked by a few people were about my experiences thus far in college —literally less than a month— and if I had any interest in “greek life”. I responded to the questions by expressing my interest in the leadership that I saw on campus and that I was especially drawn to the “Deltas”. Of course, at that exact moment I found out that one of my amazing church mentors was a member of the sorority –and of courseee, I thought that this was “fate”! (How could it not be?!) Anywho, my mentor proceeded to encourage me to look into and do my research on all BGLO sororities to see if DST was really the one for me. I did my research and the main thing that SOLD me on DST was the line — “founded on Christian Principles”. (Could it not be more perfect?! This HAD to be God speaking right?! How could it not?) Service, Yes! Scholarship, Yes! Sisterhood, Yes! AND Christian?! Sign me up! I was ready to join —lol only if it worked that way.

Now, let me not front –I was EXCITED! Excited because I felt like I could really see myself as a Delta –running the yard, changing lives, and servicing my community, and killin’ a few strolls, steps, and chants —at every event lol. I started to idolize becoming a Delta. Literally began to want it with everything that was in me. It was on my heart and in my mind, all the time. I wanted to be a Delta real bad –and I was ready to invest all of myself into attaining this dream. So…I studied the history, the founders, the 5-point programmatic thrust, DST’s impact back then, DST’s impact in the world today, and “notable” Deltas —Of course, when I found out all of the powerful women who were in fact Deltas, all of a sudden it “made sense”! These women were successful because they were Deltas. I began to attribute success to being a part of the sorority –it inspired me even more to pursue membership.

I expressed my interest, put in the work, and PRAYED. My prayers went a little like this —

“Lord, please let me become a Delta. If I get this, I’ll know that it was you. Only by your grace, your power, your might. I’ll be able to do so much in the community, help so many people. Lord, I’ve never wanted something like this. You know the desires of my heart. I am trusting you. In Jesus name, Amen.”

–See, this all sounded real good back then. I was real passionate in my prayer and meant every single word. But now as I look back, I can see that there was something clearly wrong with my prayer. I attributed God’s love for me to Him granting me entry into DST. “If I get this, [THEN] I’ll know it was you” —how can I say this? I never even considered that fact that JUST maybe it was not in God’s will for me to be a part of the organization. In all honesty, I was not even checking to know IF it was God’s will for me to join —because how could He not? He sent me so many signs showing me that this was the way to go (or so I thought). In my prayer, my ability to help others was now contingent on being apart the organization —how can I say this? God does not need a sorority in order to bless the lives of His people. Yes, God works everything out for our good & Yes, there is incredible work done through DST (and many other organizations) hence the reason as to why I was drawn to it –but the glory for the work being done and the root of who/what the work is being done for is the key difference (which I really did not understand until I started to build a real relationship with Christ).

Quick flash forward —later, after gaining membership, the glory of my wisdom, service and scholarship were done “in the name of delta” or “for the founders”.

While there are many other things to point out in the way I prayed prior to membership, the last thing I really want to touch on is that “I never wanted something like this” –which was very true, but at the same time it really revealed my heart because (in all honesty) I never even wanted God like this before. Which speaks to an all too familiar tendency of us knowing God when we need something from Him, and gradually forgetting Him after gaining the prize. I never studied for the Lord the way I studied for delta. I never worked as hard for the Lord the way I worked for delta. I never danced or stepped as hard for the Lord the way I did for delta. I certainly did not invest as much time in the Lord as I invested into delta. But this was neither here nor there –I worked and prayed (and had the GPA) to be a “Delta” –it was my calling! (Or so I thought…)

I briefly touched on God sending me “signs” that joining DST was the way to go. As I stated prior, one of the biggest signs for me was the line “founded on Christian Principles” –I needed to be apart of something that was rooted in the same faith that I was —y’all saw how hard I was praying earlier! Some other significant signs consisted of seeing people that I looked up to –mentors, close friends, teachers– becoming members of the organization. Other “signs” were connections I felt to the founders –being able to see myself in them, in their purpose and drive. When I found out that one of the first African-American women on broadway was a Delta Founder –I was like Yes! This is me! (I love the arts, everything musical theatre, and all that jazz –pun intended lol). But it even got to the point that if I happened to look at a clock and it was “1:13” or “9:13” or ended with a “–:22”, I thought it was a sign —clearly I was reaching lol. This is to show you that I was desperately looking for signs from God to confirm that this was for me.

I must say, God is not the only one that can send signs. The enemy preys off of our weaknesses, emotions, and gullible minds. If we do not test every spirit or have the gift of discernment in life, we can very easily be led astray —thinking that we are following God’s will, when actually we are willingly walking into the agenda of the enemy to kill, steal and the destroy our destinies. Anywho, back then, I was not testing any spirits —nobody had the time! I took the signs as confirmation and RAN with it! I wanted to become a member of this organization to excel and change the world and that was it!

Side note: It is really funny when the Lord gives us things that we want, we do not second guess it. But when He tests us and the answer is not what we were trying to hear, we question EVERYTHING! Sounding something like this — “Lord, are you sure sure?”  “I don’t think you understand” “I’ll let you think about it a little more” “I really believe this would be best for me, you just wait and see” —this is the easiest way to undermine our Creator and also the quickest way for us to remove our life from the protection of God’s all-knowing hands and place it in the limitations of our own understanding.

In short, after doing my research, I was ready and willing to do what I had to do in order to become a member of DST. I was committed and had no intentions of turning back —even to the point of bargaining with God after He made it explicitly clear that I needed to let it go (I will touch on this in Part II). As I said earlier, God does indeed have a way of working everything out for our own good to ultimately return the glory back to Him. He has the ability to save and redeem us from ourselves and our own disobedience due to the desires of our flesh. God knew the love I had in my heart for delta. He knew of my unwavering devotion, the temporary happiness, pride, and newfound completeness that I would feel after joining. He also knew very well the spiritual repercussions and bondages that I would face and struggle to break free from in the coming years. But as I said before, back then, I was unbothered –ignorance was bliss and delta was the ultimate goal. Nothing would deter me from this dream.

Part II Coming Soon…

Life As A Member of DST

Life After Finally Answering God’s Call

Thank you for being with me thus far on this journey, love. I pray that the beginning portion of my testimony was able to bless you in some way, shape, or form —even if it prompted you to do a quick check on the motivations of your own heart. There is purpose and power in every situation that the Lord restores and carries us through —so please, never undermine or sit on your testimony, whatever it may be. You were blessed to be a blessing to others.  If you are still interested in learning more about my journey to Denouncing Delta: Answering God’s Call, please join me in the coming days for Part II.

>>CLICK HERE TO READ PART II<<

Until next time… Continue to Shine Bright & Illuminate Your Life!

Lots of Love & Sunshine,
Shanice <3

Life After Undergrad: Graduate School

After graduating from undergrad in May 2014, I felt very peaceful about this milestone. My peace came because I already knew exactly what I was doing after graduating with my Bachelors –which was similar to what I was doing before… More school. I decided to get my Masters Degree immediately following my Bachelors because I did not want to risk not actually returning back to school. I heard all too often about people completing their first degree, landing a job out of college, and then getting too comfortable in the life of earning money and new found freeness in schedule. Going back to school then becomes more of a task, outweighing the initial value and importance of earning that second degree.

Sidebar: I know everyone is not called to attain a second degree. My reference here is based on individuals who had the goal of continuing school, but lost their drive after gaining freedom and income.

Knowing myself, I did not want to take that chance. Now, fast-forwarding to my Masters… Thanks to the Lord that I was able to get into a Master’s program at my alma mater! I did not have to move from my apartment –which was a huge blessing! (I will write another blog post about stepping out on faith and choosing to re-sign my lease prior to having any concrete plans post-grad). I physically did not have to change anything about my environment. The main changes that took place were that: 99% of my closest friends graduated and left and the type of courses that I enrolled in were now dramatically different. I went from an arts-based major (Theatre with a minor in Chemistry…yes, I know lol) to Public Administration. This was a significant shift, but I was able to mold the program to be relevant to my interests –the arts, underrepresented groups, and nonprofit management.

Now, going through my Masters program, it was certainly not an easy journey because tasks that I avoided in previous stages of my life started to pop again. I tried to avoid writing my entire undergraduate career –BUT of course my new area of study required me to now write papers week-after-week! Multiple papers per week! Up to 50 written pages of paper in a research! It never ended and I thought it was very funny —How sway? Funny how?? Well, I was able to see the funny in it because God knew writing was something that I avoided all of my life and of course it ended up catching up with me –which is very true for almost everything in our lives.We cannot avoid going through challenges because when we go around it, we will surely end up bumping into that same obstacle in a new area of our lives— and that is basically what happened to me in graduate school and writing. I was able to complete graduate school developing and see strengths in my writing that I never knew existed.

Sidebar: I share this as my testimony to show you that there is always a blessing on the other side of your challenges. I avoided writing because it takes a lot of effort for me to begin a piece, however, when I write, I find my voice –a voice that so eloquently conveys the deepest ponderings of my heart. Avoiding going through the challenges, meant that I was avoiding building and retrieving my divinely gifted talent. So, the next time you want to avoid an obstacle, please first consider what blessing may lie on the other side of you successfully maneuvering through it? The same thing you are avoiding may be the key to your breakthrough.

Life After Graduate School: Adulting 101

While I was going to graduate school, as time wound down, I was a very much over it and ready to graduate. However, now that I’ve graduated, I see that there was a huge chunk of life that I was definitely NOT prepared for. Adulting. A D U LT I NG. Adulting. For the first time in life, there was a no planned structure that was readily created for me –I was now charged with building my life. The joy of being set free from the boundaries of schooling was quickly replaced with confusion, self-doubt, fear, anxiousness, sadness, lostness, and even a slight depression. I was finished with school, but I was in turn just beginning life. I was also confused because I THOUGHT going through the struggle of undergrad and finally figuring out what I wanted to major in would be the answer to the rest of my life –all my life’s questions should have been settled once I picked a major, right? That was the biggest lie ever conceived! Then to get to my masters, I thought that I arrived in life since I was on a “real” track and focused on a particular area of study. I really THOUGHT I had it all down pack… ← This was another big lie.

After graduating with my masters, I started contemplating my entire life. I started wishing that I began honing my crafts from when I was four years old– thinking of how different life would be had I started training from a toddler. I did more thinking backwards than I did thinking forwards. I started to doubt the area of focus for my Masters Degree. I also started to doubt the things I did my Bachelors Degree in. I truly believe that this replay of “ what if ” causes us to dwell on the unchangeable past, which then blocks us from embracing the possibilities of our future. Life after graduating was hard for me. It was not hard in the sense of not having support because I was surrounded with support my entire life (which I give all thanks to God for because many are unable to say the same). It was not hard in the sense of not having a place to live because thankfully I was able to move back home to Brooklyn, NY. Lastly, it was not hard in terms of struggling to find a job right out the gate of graduating because (thankfully) I was able to secure a temporary position back at the same agency that I partnered with for my graduate research.

So here it goes… Life after graduating was hard because I was not doing what I thought I would be doing. While I was technically doing “okay”, I was living FAR from my expectations and I did not know which way to take in order to get to the place that I envisioned myself. It was hard because while I was surrounded by a lot of people, I still felt alone in my feelings and on my current journey. It was hard because I truthfully did not know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. Which now when I think about it, is a tremendous amount of pressure that we put on ourselves → the need to figure out the rest of our lives so close to the beginning of our lives. There is a lot of life to learn, experience, and assess before permanent decisions are made.

I can truly say that life after graduation has been a humbling journey. I went from being employed for a few months, to quickly unemployed for a few of months, and then back to being employed. I work(ed) in a government office – I worked in a warehouse– yes an actual warehouse! And the most amazing part– I traveled! I traveled to more places in 2016 than ever in my life. I began getting booked for singing performances at events! I revamped my social media. Lastly, I finally launched my website (hey now!) and began building my brand! When I did not know what to do…I invested time in doing all of the things that I enjoyed doing –and in the midst of my being lost, I started to actually find myself.

Sidebar: This blog post is not going to be a post about how I “figured out life” because I truly have not fully lived. I am still walking and bumping into things, being caught off-guard, plans deviated, doors closing ,other doors opening, even new things peaking my interests. I am still going through life and the journey, but I just want to speak to those who are about to graduate or are or have graduated recently, to tell you that you ARE going to find yourself.

What I Have Learned Thus Far…

Before we get to the stage of discovery, we have to first actually search for something. I think it is very common for us you want to automatically arrive where we envisioned ourselves, but we would rather not go through the process of journeying there — no one ever wants to go to the journey because the journey is not always fun, the journey is not always easy, and the journey is not always sexy —but what the journey is, is necessary because you cannot get to the other side of the bridge unless you actually cross it. What does crossing the bridge entail? Walking on uncertainty, being vulnerable, taking a risk, putting your fears aside, and trekking across that bridge to your dreams and goals. It requires faith. It does not require all the knowledge, but it sure does require all faith.

I am learning more and more about myself during this stage of my life that I ever have before and this is due to now having the freedom to create my life as I want it –because I have this freedom, I am able to learn my natural responses to things and detect the areas that are in need of adjustment to evolve to where I need to be. This journey is eye-opening. This journey has caused me to second guess the plans that I originally had, but has also caused me to rely heavily on Christ (my faith) and really focus on the things that I have the power to change. I cannot change the past. I cannot change what I studied in undergrad. I cannot change my area of focus for my Masters, but I can change what I choose to devote my time and energy to on this present day.

So my loves, what I really want to tell you is, life after graduating is not entirely fun. It is hard. But it is so very necessary. During this new season, you will learn more about yourself than you ever knew possible. While going to the journey of discovering who I am and what I will do for the rest of my life, it became very easy for me to look to the world (google, career quizzes, friends, etc.) to define where I needed to go. I started to seek the world for immediate answers, rather than wait on the Lord for guidance and divine confirmation.This is the worst thing that you could ever do –because you are then turning away from your Creator, The One who knows you most and created you to be all that He has called you to be. God is your roadmap, He will guide you–when you let Him. You will grow, if you are willing. The journey will be worth it, once you embark on it –I believe this for both you and myself.

God is been so faithful to me thus far on this winding journey, so I encourage you to trust Him in this post-graduate season because you will soon see that the benefit of the challenge is well worth the ride. A huge CONGRATULATIONS to all of this upcoming Spring 2017 Graduates! Enjoy this moment <3

Until next time… Shine Bright & Illuminate Your Life!

Shanice

P.S. These beautiful graduation photos of my FABulous MPA Beauties were taken by Eduardo Huerta (Photography For A Purpose).

-ShesAMotivator

-ShesAMotivator

-ShesAMotivator

Thank you for stopping by again! If you follow me on SnapChat or Instagram, you know I had an awesome grocery-run last week and scored BELOW my $50 Budget that I have set aside for 2-weeks of groceries. I received a lot of questions asking how I keep my grocery budget so low and requesting recipe ideas, so here I am to deliver! Below you will find a “How To” list for grocery shopping on a budget, and recipe ideas utilizing the groceries that I purchased from my most recent trip. I frequently post-cooking videos on my SnapChat (ShesAMotivator), so if you have not done so already, please be sure to follow on there to get a sneak peak on some additional yummy recipes! Keep reading for my List of Shopping Tips, Grocery List, and Recipe Ideas! Okay, here we gooo…

• Plan out your meals. I am constantly on Pinterest researching new recipe ideas and healthy substitutions. Pinterest is a great tool for both beginners trying their hand at cooking and advanced chefs who would like to switch things up in the kitchen. Click here to follow me on Pinterest, I have many categorized recipe ideas pinned to my boards!
• Plan your shopping trip. Always have a pre-made list to keep from getting distracted. Supermarkets are already daunting in itself with endless food options, sales, and samples. Like the old saying goes, when we fail to plan…we plan to fail. So let us go into our budgeted grocery run with a plan to succeed and a guide that help us bypass the temptations!

• The second, most important, part of planning is the execution! Take time to actually prepare your meals for the week. I usually meal prep twice a week, once on Sundays and once in the middle of the week. When my schedule changes, I have to make accommodations to my routine. However, the key is to figure out your schedule and carve out the time necessary for you to accomplish your goals. You cannot achieve true success without preparation.

• You tend to save money when you buy items in larger quantities, the same is for food. I suggest that you take the time to see what foods you can afford to purchase in bulk to save on coins in future shopping trips.
  • Example: Rather than purchasing individual apples of $1.79 a pound (where I would probably get approx. 4 for a little less than $4), I purchased a bag of slightly smaller apples for $3.50 (this bag contains approx. 12).
  • Bulk Location Suggestion: SAMs, BJs

• Simple. Go towards what is on sale! I am not saying to completely divert from your meal plan or grocery list, but be flexible enough to trade “like” for “like”.
  • Example: Love grapes, and I always plan to purchase them when I go shopping. BUT, if the price isn’t right, then I hold off on the grapes and purchase additional apples or grapefruits.
  • Example: I wanted to purchase 12 oz of  frozen broccoli spears but they were priced at $1.99 a bag. However, I saw that they were selling (2) 16 oz bags of frozen collard greens for $3… you KNOW I got the collard greens!

• Utilize mobile coupon apps, read through the weekly ads in your grocery store’s circular, and consider opening a membership rewards card at the grocery store that you frequent (often times this opens you up to be eligible for additional discounts).
  • Click Here to find out the 8 Best Mobile Coupon Apps to Save Money Shopping With Your Smartphone
• Even if you are unable to find coupons, there are coupon apps that will give you cash-back on your grocery purchases by just simply scanning your grocery receipt! Who wouldn’t like a nice rebate?! I recently discovered this, so I will definitely be utilizing this rebate option on my future grocery-runs.
  • Click Here to learn about 10 Free Apps that Pay You for Scanning Grocery Receipts 

• It’s okay if you get to the counter checkout and start to have second guesses about going forth with purchasing a certain food item because it is either A) out of your budget or B) not worth the cost, or simply put, C) you just don’t want it any more.
  • Example 1: This actually happened to me on my last shopping trip. I wanted to purchase either almond nuts or pistachios, so I picked up both with the intention to price check when I got to the register (I planned on purchasing whichever priced less). I was willing to maybe spend $5 on it. However, the almonds were priced at $8.99 and Pistachios at $7.99. I immediately said NOPE, it wasn’t worth the amount that I was being given in the pack and it would put me over my $50 budget.
  • Example 2:  I picked up (1) large orange bell pepper (I originally went for the yellow but it was $1.50 more than the orange! So… NOPE). However, when I reached the register, my ONE bell pepper was priced to cost me over $2?! Howww sway? Howww?! That didn’t even sound reasonable. So you know what I did? I politely asked for the bell pepper to be removed from my purchases.
  • If I had purchased my almonds and bell pepper, my bill would have been over $55 (and that is NOT the goal).

• Whether or not to go “organic” is honestly your personal preference. You should know that when choosing organic goods, you will be charged substantially more than non-organic goods. I truthfully only began considering organic foods within this last year and a half, thanks to my health-conscious boyfriend. When purchasing groceries, I prioritize my non-negotiable foods. My non-negotiables that I purchase organic/wild-caught are my: meat, fish & poultry. I am not as strict with my fruits and vegetables, but I make a greater effort to be aware of which produce have the highest pesticide residues (the “Dirty Dozen”) and to purchase accordingly.
  • If you would like to know for yourself: Click Here! 

• This may seem obvious, but like my boyfriend always tells me…common sense isn’t always common. It defeats the purpose to go grocery shopping on a $50 budget, and then buy outside food ranging around $10-$15 per meal. When I grocery shop on a $50 budget for 2-weeks this ideally covers 30 meals = 3 meals a day for 10 days (I exclude Saturdays & Sundays and focus my meal-prep for the Monday-Friday workweek). Just imagine, if I purchased outside food for approximately $10 for each meal… I would be spending $300 on food every 2-weeks!!! Nope. No, thanks. Simply taking the time to meal prep and carry my lunch to work rewards me with $500 SAVINGS per month! ($250 saved bi-weekly).

• Cabbage
• Mushrooms
• Collard Greens
• Cilantro
• Zucchini (2)
• 1/2 Pumpkin
• 3 Jalapeños
• 4 Beets
• 2 Large Sweet Potatoes
• 1 Can Lima Beans
• 2 Boxes Vegetable Broth
• Bag of Green Apples (Approx. 12)
• 6 Grapefruits
• Whiting Fish
• Salmon

1. Cabbage & Mushroom Stir Fry
2. Hearty Vegetable Medley Soup (pictured)
   1. (Pumpkin, zucchini noodles, collard greens, sweet potato, cilantro)
3. Sautéed collard greens
4. “Refresh” Soup
   1. (cabbage, collard greens, zucchini, beets, and mushroom)
5. Sweet Potato Cakes
   1. (Sweet Potato, cilantro, sweet corn)

1. BBQ Salmon, roasted pumpkin & collard greens (pictured)
2. Fish soup
3. Honey glaze salmon
4. Honey Teriyaki Pan seared salmon
5. Pan seared whiting (Seasoned & Breaded with almond meal/almond Flour)

You were my “Purpose-Propelling Gem”. It is safe to say, that while you were not perfect, the ride was truly MORE than worth it.

As I take the time to view you in a glass, I can see that my cup has runneth over in discovery, achievement, purpose, passion, and love. All of the pouring out and filling up that I experienced in these past 365 days was in direct preparation for my overflow. I can feel the greatness radiating from what is to come in 2017, so Thank You 2016. I see it, I believe it, I claim it, and now I surely expect it.

To my readers, I pray the same is true for you too. May you be able to view 2016 with eyes that are willing to see past the imperfection and uncover the gems that you were able to gain along the way. Remember, it is either a blessing or a lesson. Both, blessings & lessons, have the power to impact us positively depending on how we choose to view them, use them, and grow from them. In 2017, may we believe hard and work even harder towards our goals, taking each triumph AND setback as a SETUP for greatness.

Welp, that’s all for this year folks. Thank you all for joining me on this ride and helping to make it more than worthwhile. 2016, here is my kiss “goodbye”. You really did do your thang, girl.

Lots of Love & Sunshine,
Shanice ❤️

P.S.- A huge SHOUTOUT to my amazingly talented cousin @OliviaJonasTM for an amazing photo shoot. You will be seeing ALOT more of her here on ShesAMotivator.com & and in world in 2017. MintOwlProductions shall be coming soon to a screen near you! Be on the look out! You can click here to check out her YOUTUBE Channel while you wait 😉